The Beginning of Bullying is the Absence of Love

The Beginning of Bullying is the Absence of Love

Bullying is never a permanent behaviour. There is a precise moment in time when one becomes a bully and someone else becomes a victim.

And, if for the first one may be a choice, whether conscious or unconscious, for the second one is a never expected nor imagined prospect.

The question is if human are born to bully or rather to be victims.

It would be extremely improbable to be born a bully but not to become a bully.

In other words, everyone can become a bully or a victim even if no one is condemned to stay the same forever.

Indeed, bullying means suffering in both cases, as the cause and the effect of extreme suffering.

From a psychological angle, bullying may be the result of a personal and a social response to something that you have or haven’t received, mainly in childhood.

For instance, bullies may have suffered during their childhood some form of violence, abuse or slaps and beating or perhaps they may haven’t received enough love from their parents or from other people.

Moreover, they may have experienced a serious form of refusal that has put them apart from the group, marginalized or ostracized.

But evil never needs a reason to happen. And it is always to be condemned.

Anyway, bullying is an unacceptable behavior and there is no reason that could justify, reduce or minimize the damn that it causes and its evil effects.

Victims are never guilty. Intolerance, hate and cruelty belong to the other side.

So, as stated above, bullying is always to be condemned.

Nobody can be forced to tolerate bullying within his/her environment. Nobody can be forced to suffer bullying; nevertheless, it is extremely difficult to eradicate because very few make it visible and evident.

Bullying hides itself because of fear and silence. And nobody appears to be strong enough to change things.

And what is even worse, there is no awareness of things as they really are, there is not a shared sense of responsibility or guilt about that phenomenon, and there is no respect for human dignity.

Last but not least, bullying has neither spectators nor witnesses.

On the one hand, teachers don’t ask for explanations, they don’t intervene, they pretend that nothing serious happens in their classroom but reduce everything to almost ordinary capers.

On the other hand, parents don’t know or ignore when their children are bullied or minimize if they are bullies.

The attack to human dignity happens in silence while everyone does nothing to stop bullying. And all see, hear, listen and make videos.

On the one hand, the authors of bullying must ignore facts and words or conversely, they must know perfectly the way to hit the victims and how to make them be afraid.

On the other hand, they don’t understand or do not expect how terrible the effects are of their acts of bullying.

It seems as they simply lack the perception of the gravity and serioussness of their behaviors. They can’t conceive how great the impact of violence is on their victims and how pervasive are its effects.

Whether cruelty is deeply radicated in their nature or they have suffered some bullying violence in some circumstances of their past life, is not a primary issue.

It’s also extremely difficult to judge someone else, to understand the human nature and to explore human behaviors.

If you experienced hate, cruelty, violence, expecially in childhood, how could you see the world differently or perceive it in a different way than that reserved to you?

How could you be prone to love someone when nobody loved you?

Those who live without love cannot know what love is. And bullying is equal to absence of love.

How do you feel when others make you feel a nullity?

But what if we all treat other people as we wish to be treated? Or what if we all love other people as we wish to be loved?

The world would know more love, less violence.

And it’s exactly love the starting point of every action aiming at contrasting and preventing bullying.

Love is our main resource in order to get the result, by having care for our safety and health, showing compassion towards our brothers and sisters, and empathy for the world.

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